The Boys Edition

Ummm, so I saw that one of Milan's school friends left him a message on his wall saying something like, "are you coming or what?" and then I see that he left a comment on my wall asking what date a certain band was playing. And then I got a message from him all, "hey darling, I'm coming to ****** to look for JOBS (capital letters). I'll be there soon, so we can go to that concert.". Checked his profile and it says he's in a relationship, so this will be just a friend thing, right?! I had such a crush on him and was crushed in return when he left. :/ I think I blathered on and on about him for a good month after. Anyways, the point is I need dick quick because I might be losing my mind a bit (NEW SONG called NEED DICK QUICK! Cuddling not optional).

Did I tell you that the Latin Tolstoy dude that jerked himself off via Skype is coming to visit and has promised to bend me over and give me an earthshaking what-what in retaliation for not showing him the whole caboodle via Skype. We seem to have a sense of sexual freedom when we chat. Naughty! His penis was big and purple even though he is white. He joked around and said that he was white with a black dick. I said I was white with a black ass, so he said we were meant to fuck. Just fuck, let that be clear. No sweet words, no nothing, pleasure and release, that is it and it is very clear.

I have a crush on Burrito, did you know this is still going on? It's a school girl crush, I think. Heart palpitations and head rushings and giddy silliness. It's kind of funny. There is something slightly off humor in him and I find it interesting. He's a gentleman! What a friggin' nice dude. Even if I don't bang him I'm still glad we get to hang out and stuff because he is such an all around good guy. Awwwwwww. Also, I really wonder what his penis is like. I bet he's hung. There might have been a "moment" at the bbq, but it also could've all been indigestion.

I've still been hanging out with the Lead Guitarrist; did you throw your panties at the screen when you read Lead Guitarist? Women should be throwing themselves at him. Maybe in Japan they would. An almost per word repeat of the funny convo I had with him. Women in here apparently do not care if he is in a band and do not throw themselves at him. Maybe if he weren't so self effacing and shy. Such a shy guy! Shy Guy, let's capitalize. Has a lot going for him but doesn't have the confidence to strut his stuff. Has had multiple chances to kiss me or make a move and hasn't though I know for sure that he has a thing for me.

I sing him this song.