My 'reliable' and 'steadfast' booty call just canceled on me. Waaaah waaaaaah. Says I'm too active, go out too much and that he's old. He just turned 29 and has been going through some semi-serious bouts of depression. I don't want to get too involved with him because I am not in the mood to be anybody's nurse or nanny. He wants me to be that salve and I am just sick and tired of being the friggin' Lemonade Lucy, the angel that helps every broken boy/man. I can't put you together. I can't put anyone together anymore, I refuse. Me first and the Gimme Gimme's; selfish and all about myself. I refuse to blend into another relationship. I don't want to become one with somebody. I want to be perfect halves complimentary.

That might not make sense, but I just don't want to be overtaken. I want to be seen as a whole who is married, not a half of a whole.

I'm going to eat McDonald's right now and cry into my Big Mac..... I don't eat Big Macs.