You know your mother is a pothead when:

She steals the joint you were saving for a special occasion and then when you mention how your joint has gone missing she pretends she has no idea what is going on. Finally after much prodding, she admits she smoked it, and then she mentions that it was good shit.

Random Thoughts:

• I could really go for some El Ejecutivo french toast right about now.
• Just say not to excessive facial piercings.
  
• People actually still propose marriage? I thought getting knocked up had changed that.
  
• Ugh, really too many piercings.
• Sometimes Facebook is a little too real.
  
• It's kind of odd to find high school facebook friends and see all the changes. Have we really become adults? How weird.
• Just say no to tribal tattoos. What are you in 7th grade or something?

Craigslist

Or how not to get what you're looking for pt. 1.

Whenever you out an ad in craigslist you will never ever get the response you're looking or hoping for. Really.

Thoughts On:

Looking at pictures of girl you don´t really like all that much on Facebook: I can't wait to look at your pictures and pass judgment on them.

I might be a terrible person.

Long Lost (Crazy) Relative

I have this cousin who lived in the same country with me till she was about 6. From then on she lived in the US and her and I never really had any conversations. I heard about her through the grapevine (she got knocked up and had a baby when she was 17) and I am sure she heard things about me as well. Suffice to say we were not very close in comparison with the rest of the cousins we have in common. She recently found me via Facebook a week or so ago and has been inundating all my pictures with "I love you. Miss you prima" all over the place. If I had a wall she'd be plastering it with questions and I love and miss you's.

I told my mom about her behavior and my mom mentioned that she (my cousin) was bipolar or something along the lines of it. She's been plastering the walls of all the cousins as well. Why do we feel that we're blood related we must be so wishy washy and I love you and touchy feely? We definitely wouldn't act that way with strangers, but we feel it's ok with family members we haven't seen in years?

Maybe I am just not the touchy feely with strangers regardless of their blood relations-type. I kind of just pity her. I mean, she's gained a bunch of weight, is kind of loony, is the babymama of a 7 year kid, lives off of food stamps, and is on a billion different meds. How else am i supposed to feel? Facebook is probably her fantasy getaway.

Spoken vs. Heard

Spoken: Mel Bell says, "I just got back from flag football."

Heard: I hear, "I just got back from the hospital." and say, "OMG, wtf, are you ok? Why were you at the hospital?!".

Grammar is nuts!

Munchie Food vs. Non-Munchie Food

a) Rice Crispy Treats

b) Chewy Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip

c) Feta cheese squares in oil and spices


If you chose C) you are not only correct but also very obvious.